Organizing Your Life

The longer I live, and the more I observe the lives of younger people, the more I see them struggling because of problems that can, in general, be solved if they had wisdom and patience to address them. Though problems come in all shapes and sizes, the most frequent involve elements either of confusion or debilitation. The former touches on issues of interpretation of life--i.e., what does X mean? What do people mean by that? It includes confusion in understanding the news, the flow of activities in life in our day, how to "read" the activities of others, how to discern what we should be doing in the short and long-term. Debilitation, on the other hand, is a state of weakness, lack of energy, depression or other physical and mental fatigue brought on by the stabbing memories of the past, fears about the future, financial worries, health concerns, and other things. Both confusion and debilitation lead to inefficient living. If you live in these conditions you cannot get to the activities which you love and which will enrich you and others. The rest of the essay points to ways you can overcome these conditions.

After confronting your own confusion/debilitation, and recognizing the way it often defines you, you get on the road to "life recovery" by doing three things: (1) identifying your love; (2) addressing the necessary tasks of life with energetic and focused attention; and (3) seeking ways regularly, almost daily, to put out an identifiable product that flows from your love. A word on each might be helpful

Identifying Your Love

Many young people have never been encouraged to spend time thinking about what they love. The assumption of many parents seems to be that the child just needs to be "tracked," and that in the process of tracking s/he will discover something to do, something that is financially remunerative. Yet I find people all the time who either are afraid of opening the question of what they really might love (for fear that it will lead them to instant penury or unresolved exploration of difficult emotions) or have had such difficult lives that they really never were able to raise the question. But there is no task more urgent than finding your love. Often it takes you five or more tries to identify that area. And, you don't have to be 21 to feel you can explore. Try on new possibilities as you might try on new clothes. There is nothing more beautiful or personally satisfying than to discover your love in photography, teaching children, writing, being an accountant, or hundreds of other things. You really can't spend too much time looking for this love because, in most instances, life is long and unless you find a love, you are destined for many days of sadness, depression and regret.

The Necessary Things

Several years ago I was talking to an older gentleman, highly respected in the legal community and accomplished in several areas of law. I asked him about his life and was surprised when he responded that he had spent a good deal of his life doing the necessary things but had realized that he hadn't spent as much time as he wanted on the important things. His distinction is terribly important, I think, because it stresses not simply the difference between these activities but also the pressure only to take on the necessary tasks in your life. But my point to you is that, in most cases, the necessary things only take a few hours a day and, if you truly have identified your love, you need to make time and will have time for that love. This, then, becomes the huge challenge of life--to give the necessary things their due, but not more than their due, so that you might hone in with alacrity and conviction on your area of love. Necessary things include emails to return, calls to make, relationships to pursue, appointments to keep, bosses to please, kids to take care of, a house to clean, clients to satisfy, workouts to do, and so much more. And, these things need to be addressed. You will live with guilt later on if you don't take care of them... But the crucial issue is that the necessary things should be addressed with energy, dispatch and rapidity so that you can get to your love.

I usually do this through making a list of the necessary tasks the night before, and then tick off the tasks one as I do them. I feel a great deal of freedom if I can choose the order of these tasks, and know that I will get to my love before too long. Sometimes, indeed, I just plunge right into the area of my love because I just need to be with my lover each day...But you the necessary tasks with energy and precision not only so that you only have to do them onc, but also so that you establish an energy pattern toward the world--you will work hard, and with glee, so that when you get to your love, you will address it with enormous energy and fruitfulness.

The Sacredness of the Day with Your Love

Yet it isn't enough to have a love, and to spend a good deal of time with energy dispatching the necessary tasks. You also have to be committed enough to your love so that you not only return to it or get to it nearly every day, but that you have a practical expression of your passion. It isn't just in the performance of the thng, whether it is music or writing or taking pictures, but it is the attempt to organize and even systematize the kind of beauty and love that you discover so that it is "packaged for the world." This takes more effort than simply to play a Beethoven Sonata or read a great work; it means that you also are thinking about the way that your love will find a tangible, visible, semi-permanent expression in the world.

Conclusion

Now is the time to discover that love and beauty. It may be something that is economically remunerative for you; indeed, I hope it is for many of you. But for others it may be the exploration of a long-ignored passion. Take your time to discover what it is. Lose your cynicism about life and leap into the bracing waters of discovery and creative expression. But do it in the context of dispatching the necessary things. Then, if you do it, your life will be awash with the important things, and you will never go to bed disappointed.

4216